we are lucky enough to have cool "kneeling" buses that lower for easier access and have bike racks on the front. so when I decide to be lazy and bus part of the way home, it's quite the comfortable experience.
today, as usual, I signal to the driver that I will be putting a bike on the rack and he lowers the bus for me. not too much of a difference, but the gesture is nice.
ten blocks later, another person goes to put a bike on, this time without the assistance of a kneeling bus. this man was African American and a little scraggly looking. the driver was white. was this a case of discrimination? I don't know. but it caught my eye and I noticed.
later, walking the dog I saw a neighbor of mine who is a transvestite, and a good one. it took me many months to decide man or woman, sex change or not. the hardest part, I believe, was that this particular person is what we would call an "interesting" dresser. always a little purse, always pigtails, sometimes a fun hat. today I found myself thinking that all transvestites should be fashionable dressers and feeling horrible about judging my poor neighbor on her ability to live as a woman because I don't think she dresses like a transvestite, whatever that means.
am I any better than the bus driver? I haven't looked down upon my neighbor, but reflect to myself when I see her. I feel really bad. what do you think?
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Hi, I just found your blog on the Underground Moms list and I have to say, I have experienced the same feeling when I see what I think is a "poorly dressed" man/woman/who knows?
ReplyDeleteI used to work with a lady who used to be a man. In fact, she did little to indicate this change besides stuff a little bra around her barrel chest, wear a slightly feminine t-shirt with her jeans, gaudy earrings, lipstick and waaaay too much perfume. She still had short hair and would tell stories about her tour in 'Nam (she also believed that in 2012 we were all going to become immortal and that fairies were real so I'm not too sure how bright she was).
What I realised is that I see plenty of older ladies and young ladies, born with their girl bits, who dress badly and don't know how to put on makeup. Why should someone who came into the game later than they did know how to wear the right shade of lipstick and dress themselves flatteringly?
I've often thought that they're aren't enough resources for the transgendered community to assist in this transition. Where's the reality show that gives TGs a makeover to help them become the man/woman that they see inside? I know these services exist, but they aren't in every community. Maybe this is a niche that needs filling. Hmmm...