How have you changed in the past 3 months?

I'm glad you asked!

1. I have developed seasonal allergies to whatever blooms here in the fall. After a "oh sh*t I'm allergic to dust mites and they're in our mattress" scare, we have determined I am just allergic to the normal stuff. Still pretty horrible.

2. I have lost 10 lbs! Without trying! Baby weight finally leaving after 19 months. This is a very cool and very frustrating consequence of being sick for a month, eating smaller portions, and carrying 35-lb children around on your back. The few clothes I brought no longer fit, including the brand new pair of shorts that my mom and I argued about over the size (she swore I should get the smaller ones and I demured). I feel frumpy every time I walk out the door. And I want to buy new clothes, but finding time to go shopping without the family is hard.

3. I'm building really awesome relationships with my students. Rad.

4. I love my husband more. We went out last night (without kids until 11!) and I could only think about how much more I love him because of this experience. He has always been supportive of anything I wanted to do, but he has taken on the role of a house husband with relish. He cooks. He cleans. He gets up early with the girls. He doesn't get mad when I have to work for the 4th night in a row. He puts up with my bad moods. He tries to learn Chinese and find the cool parts of the city for us. He just jumped in, by my side, smiling, into this crazy city that is now home. And I'm finding I don't have the vocabulary to really express what I mean. But wow, how I love this man.

5. I understand less of what my child says as she learns to speak. As Penny learns English, she is also learning Chinese. Harper too. But Penny has a Chinese nanny 2 days a week (for $15 a day!) and is learning a lot of Chinese from her. We went walking last week and Penny pointed to a little orange a little boy had and said something. The grandparents with this boy went crazy over the fact that Penny said something and repeated it over and over excitedly. I still have no clue what she said. Apparently, it was Chinese.

6. I'm living in China!!!! Yeah, still new, still amazing.

How have you changed since I left? Would love to hear.

Being a mom in China

Being a Caucasian mother in Chongqing is difficult. There are so many things I don't have here that I take for granted back home: clean water out of the tap; clothes without a bunch of sparkly crap on them; car seats.

But most of all, it is two things: the attention, and reading labels.

Oh, the attention. Alone, I bring a lot of attention to myself just because I am not Chinese. I constantly hear waigouren, foreigner, when walking about. Add two adorable children, one with blonde hair, the other chubby cheeks, and swarms begin. Everywhere we go with the girls we cannot stop moving. Stopping means people come to touch, clap at, scream at, and essentially scare, the girls. People touch their hair. People pet their faces. Older ladies, especially, clap in the girls' faces, scream things at them in Chinese, and send the girls scrambling for cover.

I understand that in China, there is a different meaning of personal space. Friends hold hands walking down the street, and standing right up against someone in the checkout at the grocery store is not uncomfortable.

But frightening small children is too much. The girls will become visibly upset and people just laugh, and come in for more. The touching is one thing. The clapping is another. But not stopping when kids run and cry is too much. It really REALLY bothers me.

I was nice in the beginning, but now, I don't stop. I push hands away. I protect my girls.

And no more pictures. What are we, a freak show?

The other thing bothering me lately is not being able to read labels. It's annoying as a mom, and just as a shopper. I am used to knowing what I am purchasing. Most times now I can only guess. It has pushed us toward much more fresh food, which is good, but sometimes you just want to make something out of a box. Not that there is much of that here, but what exists is not available to us. Pictures on labels and boxes are even less reliable here with no enforceable laws against false advertising. There's no way to be sure what ingredients are in something. Mostly we guess, and have been alright so far. But not knowing what you are feeding your child is a bit unsettling.

Overall, we are adjusting to life in Chongqing - I am adjusting. I seem to be having the most difficult time, but I also have had the least exposure to the city. I have been working since 5 days after arriving. The culture shock has hit me harder. I will get used to it, and create survival strategies to manage.

But until then, I hate being a mom in China.